I apologize for not posting lately.  It’s been a busy, but exicitng week. I should have the new review up by late Saturday morning/early afternoon.

But for now…

I am deviating a bit from my normal reviews in order to bring a story that I believe any geek would appreciate, as well as perhaps provide a travel destination for a few (Tim) in the future. Tis a tale of wonder, intrigue, and beer. I call it, Wrobel’s Geekspot: Vacation Spots for the Geek in you.
The story begins as my fiancé and I met up with my parents in Milwaukee for a short weekend. They paid for the hotel room, and both of us have never been, so we figured why not, something different to do on a Saturday. The afternoon was spent driving around the city, taking tours of tourist traps, and finding places to eat throughout the day. It wasn’t until after diner when my father suggested a bar for some drinks that the trip went from decent to one I would not forget.
My father had frequent this bar some 35 years ago and was overly excited to go back. It’s rare to see my dad get excited about anything really, so to see this level of enthusiasm was a bit shocking. The bar (called The Safe House) is actually located in an alley way off of Well’s street in Milwaukee with no sign that would actually establish itself as a bar, or anything for that matter.

There was a line of about 6 to 8 people, but that was only because each group that goes in is immediately stopped by some rough looking women. Okay, so not exactly. It was two small girls in their mid-twenties with rub on tattoos across their chest and arms. This room is small. It can only fit 10 people at most with only one other door then the one you came in from. Once inside this room, one of the ladies asks you for the password. That’s right, a flipping password to get into this place. Well, my dad thought he remembered the password. He was close, only one word off. So, in order to gain entrance we had to perform some silly bunny dance for the girl’s amusement. Once they were satisfied, a switch was flick and the book case to our right swung open, revealing a flight of stairs. Okay, now this is interesting, I thought. Up the stairs the four of us went and down a hallway with nothing but a mirror at the end of it. I stopped halfway down the hallway asking my dad, “Now what?” My question was soon answered though as my father neared the mirror and the wall to right slid open like the doors to the bridge in Star Trek.
No sign for the bar? Secret password to get in? Sliding walls? Yup, as you might have guessed, The Safe House is a bar with a spy theme, and is the best theme bar (or place for that matter) that I have ever been to. As soon as you pass the wall’s threshold the spy movie memorabilia (mostly James Bond material) that line the place pop out at you. It can seem a bit cluttered, but the decorations provide entertainment in itself just by looking at them.

As soon as we grabbed a table, my father ran off like a school boy, seeing what has changed in the place in the past 35 years. According to him though, very little. As you might have thought, mixed drinks have spy themed names. The 007 and Dr. No are just a few that I saw. If you have a bit of the hunger pains, The Safe House offers a full menu that features special spy themed names as well (I have to try a Jack Bauer on my next trip).
The secrets of the Safe House do not stop once you enter either. There is a chair hooked up with hydraulics at the bar that any server can control, making the patron in the chair rise up and down slowly. There is also a part in the floor in which a chair will rise up from the basement containing someone who is there to celebrate an occasion.
The place is a maze inside. Sarah (my fiancé) and I got lost a few times just checking the place out. There is even a door to the men’s bathroom that leads to nowhere.

There are four bars inside as well as a black jack table, dance floor, and little nooks with tables that unfortunately we were not able to check out. It seemed that this bar offered something new at every twist and turn. I would have loved to explore some more, but the night was getting late, and we were already exhausted. Sarah and I went to leave through the exit but my father stopped us. Apparently The Safe House had another treat for us. He took the four of us into a phone booth (pretty cramped let me tell you) and closed the door. He then picked up the phone, dialed a number and the far wall slid open to reveal a secret passage way out of the bar into a different alley way then we had entered in from.

The inner geek in me loved this place. The décor and secrets that The Safe House offers is enough to make want to take a trip back and explore a bit more. If you’re a James Bond fan, this place was made for you! I did find out the password, but what would be the fun in telling you? If I had to make a fool out of myself getting in there, I think you should as well. Besides, it’s all in good fun.

-Brian